Monday, November 9, 2009

Valve Control

Somehow it is November, which is impressive. I do not remember what it was like to be in the middle of September or October, but here we are now on the other side. Being on the other side has provided me with resolve. I have resolved to shut off the valve that brings me things to worry about, to contemplate, to tend to. When I'm not careful about the valve, the pipe it's connected to overflows and items that seem more important than they really are wake me up 2 hours before I need to be up to tell me to pay attention! And the water bill! Don't forget to pay the water bill! There is more, but the list could go on forever, so suffice it to say that I am taking a break for the rest of the year from worrying about things that can be worried about at a later date. It's much easier than I imagined it would be, and I find simply ignoring unpleasant subjects or worrisome events to be a perfectly acceptable solution to solve the problem.

But then there are things that need to be dealt with immediately. Like when your landlord tells you that she is going to conduct a walk through of your duplex and that she expects it to look as good as new.

Now, I have never been much of a bigot, but I'll admit this, I am starting to hold something against landlords. We are forever being warned never to trust lawyers and never to trust skinny cooks, but what about landlords? I am not nearly important enough or devious enough to have met enough lawyers to make a fair case for the professionals in the occupation, but I have seen the "never trust a skinny cook" saying printed on an apron before which must make it true.

Recently our landlord sent us pictures of what our duplex looked like when we first moved in. The set of pictures included a pristine white bathtub, without the permanent black sludge trackings across the bottom that the previous tenant had kindly left us. And right beneath that picture was a picture of what the wood kitchen counters and sink looked like when I first moved in. Except our kitchen counters aren't made of wood, they are made of a special sort of linoleum that is pretending to be a sort of sad marble. Which makes me pretty sure she is trying to pull the wool over our eyes on this.

On Sunday, as Alan and I took turns getting high off of our liquid gel cleaners and throwing every ounce of muscle into scrubbing off the tar from the bottom of the tub, I thought that maybe I would lead the movement to help bring truth to the people. Yes, I would get started on having "Never Trust A Landlord" printed on aprons ASAP.

12 comments:

CAM said...

I agree - don't trust them...they can be dodgy. We always take a whole CDs worth of pictures when we move in and give a copy to them with a typed up report on any faults, wear and tear etc....it seems strange for the tennant to gaze at their giver of roof over head with some suspicion but it is better than learning the hard way that they have some odd hobby of making lives difficult. Good luck with the inspection :)

Razzberry Corner said...

My girl, good luck with the crabby landlord and the insane inspection. Take it from me - I've been a landlord many times over - they are not all like that! Although I like your idea of NEVER TRUST A LANDLORD apron!
-Lynn

2busy said...

That's why I bought a house. Now I only have to answer to me. I think I am worse.

Katherine said...

Oh, we've had the dreaded walk though. Which is were suddenly you realize that the person who lived there before you must not have had one, because there is no way the mess behind the fridge is yours.

Erin P said...

Good one, Katherine! Oooh! Hate the walk-through. Good luck with that. It really isn't fair! hope it goes well.

Karin said...

Goodness, are you really moving again?? Where are you headed to this time? Hopefully it's a place with a nicer landlord. We started looking at places this past weekend, which is exciting but really makes me dread yet another move. I still have tons of stuff in boxes from my last move!

Sobrina Tung said...

We weren't planning on it, she just wants to do a walk through! I've never heard of landlords doing that before, I know that never happened for us in LA... Anyway, now that I've called her out on the pictures that aren't of our place, she hasn't responded about setting a date for the walk through... how... odd... Where are you guys looking to move?

Rich said...

Like the previous people said, take pictures, lots of them. With date and time stamps. I had a "Realty" company try to charge me for things 6 months after I moved out. Turns out the place had been broken into while it was empty and they had some fun. Luckily for me, I take pictures of everything, including the color and condition of the grout in and around the tub(don't ask). It saved me thousand's of dollars having these pictures. Didn't even need a lawyer. Just remember your brand new mantra, pictures, pictures, pictures! You can even do funny action poses with the tub, the sink, the kitchen counter to make it more exciting.

Sobrina Tung said...

hahah, ok, adopting the mantra... pictures!! Glad that you didn't have to pay for all those damages!

MunkyBt said...

Ugh. I wish my hubby and I had had the foresight to take pictures of our last apartment when we first moved in. I very much doubt we would've had any problems with the original landlady we had, Patricia. The entire complex loved her because she was really open & honest, got necessary repairs taken care of quickly, and spoke with a fabulous French accent. She was the poo, and we were totally spoiled rotten while she was there. Unfortunately, she was offered a better paying job the next county over, and she was superseded by a series of incompetent morons who turned our beautiful complex into a graffiti/crime ridden crack den. At one point a repairman tried to enter my apartment while I was blow drying my hair (in my underwear) and got an eyeful of my chubby half nakedness because the jerk he worked for told him to enter my apartment when he thought I wasn't home. Then when I chewed the landlord out for not even notifying me that anyone would be coming by, he tried to blame ME then the embarrassed repairman for HIS fuck-up. Because of him, I have forever labeled all landlords to be the spawn of Satan. (This, of course, excludes Patricia and Razzberry Corner.)

Sobrina Tung said...

Isn't it times like those that totally make you wish you were your own landlord??

Breenuh said...

Oh no, that's so awful! Maybe try to find photos taken in the house that show the condition it was in previously... Good luck!

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